2025, The Year I Finally Quit

Hello! I know it’s already the end of the month but I do want to keep my promise to at least post something monthly so here I am. December has been pretty hectic for me, which was why I didn’t post or write much. I had been preoccupied with my personal life and off-line activities — I made a mental note to not use the term irl or in real life, because BOTH online and offline are real to me and I don’t differentiate or create any persona whatsoever— I barely had the energy to draw, and when I did, external factors just had to cause a little bit of disturbance.

Now without further ado, I don’t intend to have this post be a recap post because I drew hundreds of art this year and I don’t think I want to crowd anyone, even myself, with my art. So what I’m going to do is compile a quick timeline of what happened throughout the year. Before we move on to the list, I dare you to count how many times I quit things this year.

January

I was still working in my family’s factory this month, it had been short as I only started in November 2024, but I made the decision to quit in January, just before the year of the Year of the Snake begun. There were many reasons but overtime I just didn’t see myself working there, and I wanted to stick to my motto: to not mix friends, family with work.

February

I applied to a permanent position in Milqilin as a guest artist and was thankfully accepted as one of their PGA in February.

March, April, May

I actively made adopts and made double the minimum wages through my art constantly each month. My income mainly came from the PGA sales and commission work. My most expensive commission being custom design work for Meiiru on Vgen which includes a full commercial use. 

June

I had a problem with paypal so I ‘quit’ using it to receive payment. I was pretty sad that I couldn’t withdraw the money I’ve earned the previous months. I got scammed too and lost 99% of my savings despite needing to buy a pen replacement. I stopped using Paypal even on my vgen too so I did lost some customers, but I also gained new ones. 

July, August

I moved back to my hometown, it’s 2 hours away from the capital. Life there was slow but I was happier because I was surrounded by cats. I continued taking commissions and went on multiple off-line workshops, ranging from make up, ceramic painting and korean glass art. 

In August, I made the decision to give up my position as PGA in Milqilin. I was thankful for the opportunity but I don’t think I want to make a living off of making adopts. I did enjoy designing these two months, some of the work I did, I was pretty proud. August was the month I fell in love with my own designs again which led me to quit Succubuns 21+ and got myself self-banned. I also decided to stop giving most of my time to arpgs and adoptables species.

In August I also made the decision to change my username from suikou1111 to Alienatedfl0wer. Suikou1111 was my actual chinese name but pronounced using Japanese onyomi, and as for 1111, it was an angel number that means “You are on the right path”. I chose it as part of my username because I wanted being an artist to be my right path. But now I know that I’m on the right path all along, I gave the number up and chose to believe in myself more, baring myself under Jasmine @Alienatedfl0wer.

September

I think I sold my first mascot base? I noticed my most popular commissions are for mascot art or mascot custom design and I honestly took pride knowing that fact because making something cute in my opinion is not as easy. And to have people liking my mascot art, makes me happy. This month I updated my art style by changing the brush I used.

October

I joined Vampichi, the species reminded me of keychain rua, the first species I joined. I also made the decision to ‘quit’ commissions. I don’t want to be relying on comms in the long run. October I also picked up my diary back and started journalling again. 

November

You know what happened.. I blogged again! I don’t think I quit anything in November, if anything, I created my best art in November (the blog’s banner which contained most of my mascot ocs)

December

I was pretty bummed that I didn’t won the vgen challenge and I think I want to stop joining them. This month though, I quit saying yes just to keep the peace or be nice. This month I reopened my comms, and my main reason was to ‘force’ myself to draw. So I was using my comms to cope. I was honestly super proud of this month’s commission work that I wanted to gush about them in one whole blog post.. but alas my time is running out, 2026 is coming.

But let me share some of my commission works that I did in December <3

Custom Design and Omakase Headshot (Personal Use) for DetachedBeauty on Vgen.
This was a custom inquiry and I’m super in love with how she came out!

Custom Mascot Design (Vtuber) for Sami on Vgen.
Another Vtuber Mascot comms I did this year!
I’m always so excited to design a cute companion for our vtubers <3

Custom Mascot Design (Somnivores 18+ ARPG) for TigerAngelz on Vgen.
This is the second time I’m working for Tigerangelz this year and everytime I’m in love with the mood board and concept they provided in the proposal! 

Other than comms, I also designed an outfit pack for premade designs/ already made ocs. I have thought about this before, but I genuinely think there are already so so so many ocs out there and I mean, if we enjoy playing dress up in real life, why don’t we give our ocs new fits too? If you’re interested, clicking the image will catapult you directly to the listing!

You can freely change the colors and combinations to better suit your oc!

The base costs $12 and can be used for multiple ocs that you own.
You only need to buy once!

All in all, 2025 is the year I finally quit and cut all things that are no longer aligned with me.. on a soul level. This allows me to make room for new things, I began to write again, my room renovation project finally has some progress, and I started reading books again. Just this year, I finished 17 books total and I plan on reading more in 2026. I released my bases, I met new people through workshops, learned new skills, and overall, I’m happy with how things are progressing. 

and fun fact, in December I began hulahooping and managed to shed 6 cms off of my waistline! I can even hold the SOFT WEIGHTED hoop on my waist for almost an hour. 

Anyways, I have to go! See you in 2026!!

XOXO

Jasmine

Birthday Blues: Bye Bye November

Immediately after I turned 29, I got sick. On 21st I went to the Vihara in early morning, did my prayer and did the coin toss thing. I asked the universe if whether what I’m about to do (stop taking commissions completely) or what I’m planning on doing (making merchs of my original characters, write and publish my own works) is right. And the fortune slip I got was just a reiteration of something I already know deep down. (Yes I’m on the right path but I need to stop thinking about money)

It was fine, BUT my aunt and one of the head help in my house pointed out that the skirt I was wearing has holes in it and from then on everything spiralled down. One of my aunt’s staff has apparently burned 2 visible holes at the hem of my nylon skirt and there’s no way of repairing it unless I cut the seams open and completely remake and repurpose the damaged bits. The skirt was a favorite find, I bought it at a local boutique that sells curated local brands. I tried looking the skirt up again but it was no longer sold.

I was angry, mostly because the one responsible didn’t come forth and did not even apologize when confronted. So I decided to go out and spend the day with my sister, grabbed an online taxi, I decided to try out one of my hometown’s famously affordable hair salon. The last time I had my hair cut was last February and my layers have all grown out and I desperately needed a trim. Later I came to regret this decision. I hated the receptionist, and though my stylist was kind, he didn’t gave me what I wanted and after a wash at home, my hair looks like shit. (I believe a good haircut means the hair shape stay good even at home. I have a shoulder length wavy hair, the stylist thinned the end too much that it looked ugly and unshapely)

After hair dresser, we had the driver drove us to one of my favorite Hikiniku Restaurant and we had our usual plus Salmon Carpaccio. It was delicious and was probably one of the thing that went well that day. We got home around 14.00 and spend our remaining days reading/drawing. 

Everything was okay until after dinner. I literally puked everything. I was already feeling nauseous so I only had oats and chia seed. I was still feeling bad because of the skirt and actually the day before, my father made a fuss about how blowing candle is against Chinese Culture— something he picked up from a tiktok video idk— and so I didn’t have my candle but I was upset because why can’t I have things my way? I wasn’t asking for much yk. I just wanted to blow the damn candle and TBH make a wish.

I felt like everything was being thrown at me on purpose. Did I mention that I also have an NPD mom? She called midnight, after wishing me a HBD, she immediately asked when will we go back to the capital, and proceeded to make remarks that just further shown her narcissistic traits. Perfect.

TLDR, I got sick and my body refused to eat anything but bananas, oats and some herbal ginger drinks for the next 2 days.I got a slight fever too it was hellish. Though on 24th, I feel signifficantly better. I decided to take a break from drawing until yesterday (29th) though and spent the day reading book and playing stardew.

Closing the month, I actually feel thankful for the sickness and the birthday mishaps. I feel like it was the universe’s way to tell me to reset. My body was given a reset because I lost 3 kgs in 3 days (though I have since gained them back). I was also allowed to slow down with my art. Before the day, I ambitiously designed 3 new characters and is already planning on another one. But the sick days forced me to stop. I had told myself to prioritise personal art project over ARPGs or closed species activities as they are meant only for casual fun but I was leaning into old patterns a little and was forced to stop.

Personally now I feel rejuvenated with new goal and to dos. I’m also happy that my room renovation project has resumed. My soul and mind is fed after I finished reading Jane Austen’s Manfield Park, now moving on to M.L. Rio’s If We Were Villains. I also had sushi with my sister and my dad yesterday.

I hope December is going to be gentler!

PS: Sorry! No new art! As stated above I’ve been reading and playing stardew. I HAVE been drawing but I try not to draw for content/clout/money so I have been taking my sweet sweet time.. Please be content with a pic of meat and ice cream :”)

XX Jasmine

I Wish/Blurred Reality

Hello! This post right here is gonna contradict the one before.. So I enjoyed the cats but after actually getting a MYO/Make-Your-Own (aka permission from a species creator to create a character of that species) I tried designing my first cat. At first I wanted to draw them after my babygirl Ruri but after some doodlings it didn’t fit right. TLDR I’m dropping out <3 I tried liking the species ever since they launched on Toyhou.se but something made me held myself back back then, then came the PSA about them banning a member without warning so that was a turnoff but sometimes has passed and when I tried again, I enjoyed it at first after two prompts plus the payout was good and all but eventually I got turned off by the website and the lore/desc. It  just didn’t speak to me on a soul level like idk how to explain it. 

But I’m not gonna delve deeper into that, it’s just simply not my thing. The main focus of this post is actually my recent illustration (that I used as banner for this blog) 

This piece took me 12 hours 4 minutes, realistically roughly 3 days ish with breaks in between. I included ALL of my current jackalope fairies and a baby version of my Vampichi, Latte (the little baby on bottom right corner). It was made for this month’s Vgen Challenge : Wish and my thought process was that, I as an artist WISH to make my creation ‘come alive’ at least on screen. So the girl is my persona, Jasmine, she’s just happy that her little bunnies came out of the ipad screen, while Petal, our alien mascot is surprised as well. To make the whole vibe looks more dreamy, I added a cloud train, kitty trains and a couple cloud bats. The room itself was actually inspired by @rainbowloft on Instagram. Her room is such a dream! 

This piece was posted mandatorily on my X account, but to my surprise they gain the most tractions and I got 6 new followers! Honestly X/Twitter’s algo has been shit lately and there’s barely any interactions so to me, the 10 likes I got felt like 1000. I literally thought to myself: oh so this is how it feels like to have a ‘Viral’ post LOL (ik it’s not even close but the engagement for me is THAT bad so yk gotta celebrate every smoll moments yk) I do hope I win the challenge though.. if you use Vgen, please vote for my art <3<3<3

I also wanted to say that this piece was my greatest gift from my 28 year old self to ME! — I just turned 29 on 20th!! I spent the 18th and 19th on designing some new characters as another mini presents..

Salm, a Vampichi with special Halloween Meat Trait! Inspired by Salmon the fish

Dream, a Bunny Wish Snail from the Species’ November MYO Event. The theme for this event is ‘Dream’

Mandatory note that ‘Vampichi’ is a closed species by Mushies and Sha while ‘Bunny Wish Snail’ is a closed species by Pumpkin Cat Carnival. Both are super cute and speak to my soul that’s why I’m staying yk the drill. That aside there’s still one more MYO left to make and it’s my first Somni! Honestly I don’t have any ideas yet but I know I want the bat to be simple enough so I don’t need to fuss over the details when drawing them. 

Aside from the new ocs, I also won a cute vamp from the vampichi discord <3 I’ll share the character later once I drew them but this month truly is magical <3 (Latte also got featured so I got a few new art of her!)

To recap! I got 10 new watchers on DA, 6 on X, 3 on Vgen, a couple new characters, amazing art from fellow artists, new arpg to enjoy (somni), more importantly, a sense of improvement and satisfaction with my own art. I actually enjoyed drawing the large piece above and plan on making more unreal art featuring my girl sona and other characters! 

I got a pair of mules from the local shoemaker, 1 domi sticker sheet, new iPad case, (not shown but) a bunch of MLP cards, 1 UR Rainbow Dash card, and my room design sketch! (I’m tbh in the middle of renovating them and bc it has such a weird shape, it was hard arranging the furniture according to good fengshui and my taste but my sister did a good job! 

Room Design by my sister @ylverre on X
This is honestly my fav present!

Okay, that’s all about today. On 20th we went out to take away some Chinese food from Eastern: Birthday Noodle, shumai and wangshui dumpling, pochai with 3 eggs, chicken lemon sauce, and tofu with shimeji. It was so delicious. I also finally had my dream cake: cookies and cream ice cream cake for my birthday. 

Though it wasn’t a perfect day, it was in its own way ‘perfect’ to me because it felt like any other day, just a little bit special-ish. 

All in all I wanted to say that I’m super grateful for all the support and love I’ve received from the past years. I hope my dream can flourish more so I could uplift those around me. 

XX Jasmine

Heaven and Hell

As someone who’s recently free from commissions, I’m feeling a little lost. Yesterday I managed to get my Somni 18+ MYO* but I need to draw more to get the higher rarity trait. I didn’t, HAVEN’T joined the discord YET because I made a promise to myself to be casual and to be mysterious-ish, like, I don’t want to shove my art out there, I just want to put them out there g-e-n-t-l-y.

Then there’s the inactivity in Vampichi, tbh I can always put my Latte in the dtva/ draw-the-vampichi-above channel so I have to draw the previous vamps, but I have done 6 DTVAs within the past month (and I do feel bad if I keep posting her there even though I always finish my part ASAP. I’d talk about them here but at the moment I’m still fleshing out more lore for my vamp, and I NEED to make her counterpart/enemy. So I’m a little stuck-ish.

I know I don’t want to revolve my art and drawings around species PLUS 3 people have told me before I have to make my own thing but it’s so hard to focus sometimes.. does this mean I’m still a little insecure with my art hmm?? I’d like to think I’m in a better place at least compared to last year. I always review my progress everytime I’m approaching my birthday and I guess rn I’m just contemplating things YET AGAIN. Anyways, my hand itches if I don’t draw so I went to Cupid Cats (another 21+ ARPG) and fleshed out 2 prompt arts using their NPCs..

Ticket to Hell Prompt featuring Byte, Pick and Spade. All NPCs. 2h28m

Inferno’s Kiln Prompt featuring Spade, Pick and Gourd. All NPCs. 2h14m

The prompts I did were for the devidog unlock prompt, where I’d get my first Devidog MYO after completing all art prompts. If you’re unfamiliar, ARPG or Art Role Playing Game allows you to make your own official character to be used for prompt or quest completion, usually within the community world. You’ll get rewards and sometimes items for completing and participating in prompts.

The payout for both somni and cupid cats are good though so I’m happy so far.. and I’m —again, super proud with how they came out. But same with somni, I made sure to not join their discord for now bc I want to be as casual as I can be.

I told myself I’d think of something, maybe coming up with my own monthly art prompts like old instagram days and maybe I need to go on with my outfit collection afterall.. ugh! Being out of comms feel like heaven for me but it’s also hell because my indecisiveness is acting up and I need to create my own ‘things to work for’. 

*sigh* I saw on IG reel the other day about being an artist and OP was honestly so right: being a full time freelance artist = have to be ready with lots of uncertainties and you won’t even know what you’re doing 50% of the time but you have to still show up and create. It made me feel better knowing that this is probably universal and is a mental, like all I have to be is to be sure of myself. And be delusional. Anyways, I know I will pull through, I’ll talk more about my drawing process, my art and the likes in future posts promise! 

PS: me and my sister have begun closing our activity rings these past week, and I have been cutting down sugar and eating healthier lately. My aunt and uncles also bought me vitamins and supplements to help with my liver and health. Super thankful for them tbh.. which makes me want to work harder so I could somehow repay them (or at least make them proud)

I know the title is not titling but whatever!

See u on the next post!!

Jasmine :)

BATS AND BLUEBERRY BREAD

Hi

I hope this post finds you well!! I shared about the blog on Toyhouse since I think that’s the one place where my stuff reach most people —oh how I want to change this so bad.. I think I’ll give instagram another chance but IDK. DeviantArt has been growing steadily but that’s about it and I hate how laggy the site is?! It never let me change my username despite me having core.. sent the mods a ticket but alas no response so far.. talk about incompetent 

Anyways recently (more like yesterday) I have been getting back into ARPGs again after taking a small break and because my current obsession, Vamps are taking a break this month, so there were no monthly prompts. This time I told myself it would be purely for fun and will try to play without the intention of making any money or promoting anything. If the money comes while I’m having fun then so be it but I won’t be going out of my way to promote myself!

Somnivore 18+ ARPG prompt art featuring NPC007:Bunny 

The ARPG I was focusing on right now is Somnivore 18+ I have heard about them since their launch but I was in an ARPG slump due to another one iykyk LOL! and I was indifferent with bats. BUT a little friend told me to check them out and I did, and I love how they have all the world fleshed out?? I love it when a creator created something and they love it so much it translated to their work!! 

Another Somnivore 18+ prompt art because I’m trying to get my first MYO! So happy with how the sky came out though!

It’s such a new feeling that I fell in love with the world first then the species itself, I also would LOVE to point how they allow anthropomorphic form of the bat to be drawn and submitted in the ML and the humanoid form were allowed colorful skin! So dreamy! and FUN!!!

My last NPC-007: Bunny prompt art that I did this week!

It’s funny how my current focus happens to be bats though, Somnivore 18+ by Wyspic and Vampichi by Mushies and Sha. I’ll probably talk about them more in another posts and maybe other species group I’ve partake in so far ^^

The bread vs Petal.. look at how smol she is

Yesterday the bread my aunt pre-ordered for us came—! Look at how huge they are? Adding in a silly petal doodle too (bc I can and i super need to build her lore) I ordered blueberry peanut and strawberry peanut one. Blueberries by itself are expensive here but I love them. Thank God jams are more affordable though!!

Anyways G2G! I’m going to the mall to treat my aunt to Pepperlunch with my sister <3 Will take her to the newly opened Aeon supermarket too!!

Edit: I came back from the mall and am glad that my Aunt enjoyed my fave restaurant! We went to the bookstore and bought some more bread, meat and 4 Litres of Oi Ocha from Aeon^^  after that we went back home, and I continued with my Somnivore Lune grind (Lune is their currency, isn’t it cute??) I’m also over the moon because Netflix has restocked more horror movies to company me while I draw..

Thank you for reading! See you in the next post <<Will probably talk about Vampichis in my next post>>

XX Jasmine

11:11 Art Blog Launch

Okay.. where do I begin?

Let’s do a mini mandatory intro post! My name is Jasmine (I used to go by Suikou1111). I am currently a fulltime freelance art illustrator but I hope to expand my reach to creating my own merch and hopefully able to publish my own works —be it written or drawn— physicially. Being an artist have been a childhood dream of mine since I was in kindergarten and after contemplating for years whether this is the right path for me or not I decided it’s time to stop being flimsy and insecure and to have faith in my art!

Now on to the blog itself, I have been wanting to move my carrd to a blogspot like this since August or Sept but it was teddious work-ish and it’s been YEARS since the last time I blogged or use blogger.. and I’m pretty sure Blogger removed some features because the customization options are not as fun as it used to be —would you believe me if I say that I used to run a beauty blog with my bestie back in highschool?? I also managed to get a KOREAN brand review requested by their rep.. it was of a lip crayon by IASO, they’re pretty good tbh but idk if they still produce those.. — anyways back to topic, yes I put the little migration on hold just like my many art projects but here we are!

Mandatory Screenshot of the blog in case it will get a make over later in the future.. or NOT

I honestly think I did a good job, for someone rusty that is. I haven’t touched HTML {I won’t count copy pasting or Frankensteining Toyhouse codes to be ‘Coding Work’ tbh} since highschool and I’m gonna be 29 in 9 days. But I’m so proud.. and happy.. I will mostly be posting about my art journeys, and projects obviously as well as other stuffs. 

I want to post on this blog 2-3x a week at most, maybe more and once a month at least. Previously I wanted to make a series of outfit collections just like how the fashion industry does fashion week but I sort of lost interest in the middle and I overthink things because my Twitter account was doing so bad and ngl that discourage me a lot.. THAT plus someone I met online has once told me that I was ‘invicible’ despite participating in monthlys, server events and even participating as Guest Artist.

I stopped being friend with that person after recognizing many passive aggressive behavior from them but *sigh* their words did get to me from time to time. Looking back, they’re wrong though because people do recognize my art and my design, despite me experimenting A LOT with brushes and rendering style. I’m forever grateful for anyone who has gone out of their ways to comment or DMed me about my art. You guys are literal angels!! But yeah, most of the times people are just projecting their insecurities, I think, it’s just sad bc more often than not these people masked themselves as our ‘friend’.

Character outfit collection would have to wait because I’m giving [writing] another chance. NGL I’m also rusty in that department so hopefully by writing for this blog I get to improve T_T

Anyways that’s it for the first post as I have to go now and do my workout.. but see you on the next post and thank you for reading!! Also feel free to drop a comment or something! 

XX Jasmine